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The search for happiness
By M. Afzal Janjua

We all seek happiness but hardly think what it is. It is a state of mind that is achieved through  satisfaction of needs and achievement of objectives. The basic human needs are Physiological, Security,  Social, Esteem and Self -Actualizations, as per  hierarchy of needs given by Maslow the well-known  psychologist. Some other words for this expression are contentment, cheerfulness, gladness, pleasure, glee, joy bliss and delight. All these refer to different degrees and states of mind emanating from different emotional experiences.
"The secret of happiness is not in doing what one likes, but in liking what one has to do." _James M. Barrie

Self- actualization is seldom achieved and not by all  people. Most of the people are limited to social or at the most esteems needs, let us understand that happiness means different things to different people on different occasions. For some it is wealth, for others it is health and yet there are others who want a combination of these two and much much more.

We all dream of holidays and vacations foreign trips to please the mind, pilgrimage to satisfy the soul, lucrative jobs to satisfy our financial and esteem  needs, beautiful villas for social status, good family environment and circle of friends for peace of mind and a place in the society. But do all of us get all of this? Certainly not. Then how can we be happy?
 
"Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love and  something to hope for."
--Joseph Addison

We must understand that we have our limitations and therefore have to define our happiness accordingly.For some person buying a precious gift for his wedding anniversary, a son’s or daughter’s birthday can bring  great happiness for another it’s a matter of not that much pleasure.

Learning to be happy is very important. There are people who live in posh localities, have beautiful homes, good jobs and all that goes with these things Yet, they are cursing their fate. Here are others who have everything in limited measure and they feel very happy about it and never complain. It is the attitude,  something within us and not outside us.

       A STORY
       Two friends met after several years in a four star
       hotel attending a reception. One asked the other. “How
       are you and family”? He said “ both my sons are
       pysicicans, the daughter is doing MBA in Malaysia, my
       Mrs. is running a primary school and myself----- I am
       having an office in posh locality, doing real estate
       business……but life is not so pleasant”

       Look! Said the other “I am a school teacher. Both sons
       are doing jobs in pharmaceutical companies, we live in
       a newly developed locality; my daughter is married
       to a\o a government employee and my wife is a house
       wife and we are very happy.

       So, happiness is a state of mind that can be acquired
       through positive thinking, contentment, and self
       suggestions. It is the positive communication with
       yourself that matters. Giving yourself messages like.”
       I am sick”, “I am heading towards a crisis’ will
       actually make you sick and troubled. Instead, messages
       like “Everything is well;” “it happened earlier also”,
       “I can face it” etc will give you courage to come out
       of crisis with greater strength.

       Another factor that robs us of happiness if FEAR. What
       is fear? It is the worst enemy of happiness. It makes
       you sick and reduces the span of life by adding
       worries. But if we understand what FEAR means we can
       get rid of it. It’s ” False Evidence Appearing Real”
       e.g. a small rope looking a snake in darkness, we come
       out of fears.

       So, get rid of your fear. 
       Concluding let me give you the MAJEC formula for
       happiness 

       o H -HAVE CLEAR IDEA OF WHAT YOU WANT FROM LIFE
       o A -AVAIL ALL OPPORTUNITIES OF SEEKING HAPPINESS
       o P - PRIORITIZE YOUR OBJECTIVES AND NEEDS
       o P - PLAN EVERYTHING IN REASONABLE DETAIL
       o I -INVOLVE YOURSELF IN POSITIVE,HEALTHY ACTIVIIES
       o N - NEVER LET NEGATIVE THOUGHTS CAPTURE YOU
       o E -ENERGIZE YOURSELF THROUGH EXERCISE AND HEALTHY
       FOOD
       o S -SEEK SUCCESS BUT BE PREPARED TO FACE ODD
       SITUATIONS
       o S - SMILE,SMILE,SMLE,WITH DEEP BREATHING
 

       MAJEC is former Chairman Pakistan Insurance Institute  and Divisional State Life. He is now teaching MBA  programs at different universities besides providing  consultancy to NIPA and some other organizations in  the public and private sectors. He has also authored  some books on HR related subjects.